From newborn to infant: Transitioning out of the first three months
Photo by Travis Grossen on Unsplash
When you bring your tiny baby home, everything can feel pretty overwhelming. For one thing, we’re recovering from a major medical event. For another, we’re becoming a new person we’ve never been before – a mom. Life is tough for our little ones too. They are experiencing the world for the first time and the hunger and pain that goes along with it.
The newborn stage is rough and often parents call it the hardest part of babyhood. Babies aren’t sleeping because they need to eat so often. Their bodies are starting to work in ways that can cause gas and pain. And they seem to be more animal than baby in the early months.
But then comes the transition to being an infant and moms need to relearn everything they thought they knew up to that point. So what are some things to watch for?
6 changes from newborn to infant
Big milestones come up
Baby milestones can be both cool to see your baby developing or frightening if you baby misses steps. My son didn’t smile or make eye contact until nearly 3 months. Not one but two doctors had started talking to be about Autism. In reality, he was just a little delayed on those milestones. By 14 weeks he was smiling and looking at people and everything took off from there.
If your baby is slow rolling over or social smiling or any of the other big milestones around this time, take a breath and wait it out. Everyone develops differently. There’s no use worrying until you know if there’s anything to worry about.
You start developing a routine
If you haven’t started before, now is a good time to get into a routine. And routines aren’t just for nighttime. My son’s wake windows were about 1.5 hours around 3-5 months. Everyday we’d take a walk during one of his wakings. Another would be used for tummy time and baby exercises, including a call to his very doting great grandmother so she could see him every day. The next window would be for books and songs. Then we’d hit nighttime which is in a category all its own. Having a plan for your day can help keep things from being too overwhelming.
Sleep changes
Just when you think you’ve gotten things all figured out, sleep gets messed up again. Most babies go through the four month sleep regression. During this time, they’re learning new skills and as a result their sleep gets choppy again. They’re also developing the ability to bridge sleep cycles more like an adult does when they sleep. Buckle in and be ready. This regression can last 2-8 weeks.
Babies become interested in toys
If those newborn toys haven’t got much use yet, don’t worry. Around 3-4 months babies are getting much more curious and independent. They want to explore their world and that includes gnawing on a few toys. Pick toys that are small and easy for babies to hold. Try not to overwhelm them with too many choices. When in doubt, offer two and let the baby decide which one they want to play with.
Babies become interested in people
Along with that increased curiosity, your baby might start being interested in other people. Faces are of particular interest to infants so make sure you’re exposing your baby to many new people and new expressions. Try to imitate the sounds and expressions a baby makes to reinforce the behaviour. Babies learn by watching us so give them the time and attention they need to understand smiling, cooing, and laughing.
Wake windows rule your life
If you weren’t tracking your newborn’s wake and sleep times, now would be a good time to start. As babies age out of the newborn stage, sleepy cues (yawning, rubbing eyes, etc) become harder to use to judge if a baby needs a nap. A far better strategy is to track their wake windows. If you 4-month-old averages 90 minutes between naps, then you’ll know to start getting them ready to wind down once you get to the 75-minute mark, for example. Timing naps this way can help avoid an overtired baby and make going to sleep simpler for everyone involved.
Change is the only constant
One thing that’s always true of babies is you’ll never actually figure things out completely. Once you have your beautiful schedule set and your baby is sleeping great, bam! Sleep regression. Teething. New skill. Rolling over. Sitting up. Something will happen to upset the apple cart and you’ll be right back to square one. Make your peace with that now and try to enjoy the ride. 3-6 months is a little easier than the newborn stage, but you’ll be faced with different and new challenges too. Take a deep breath, mama. You’ve got this.